It's Because

10cc's "I'm Not In Love" from 1975 came out just when I was in my early teens and beginning to feel like I would end up the only girl in the world who would never date, have sex or marry. Over the next few years, I'd manage to work my way through a handful of non-serious relationships, each of which was characterized by my beau expressing sentiments similar to the lyrics in this classic "love" song.

Hearing this on the radio today, as I was driving back from doing my weekend errands, brought back those bittersweet memories. Don't tell your friends about the two of us. Ah, yes. They always really, really liked me but they never wanted anyone else to know that. Did they fear that my reputation for being weird was contagious? Would their friends take their affection for me as a sign that they had fallen off the path of normal into insanity? Somehow this stigma spread even to my platonic friendships too. Weekend shopping trips couldn't be mentioned when we were back in school. The girl I spent the day with building a treehouse couldn't be seen talking to me the next week.

I've been told it was because I never seemed to want to be friends or hang out with people. I don't really buy that. If I was that much fun to be around, why were they not proud to be known as my friend (or more)?

I may never know.

I'm not in love
So don't forget it
It's just a silly phase I'm going through
And just because
I call you up
Don't get me wrong, don't think you've got it made
I'm not in love, no no, it's because..

I like to see you
But then again
That doesn't mean you mean that much to me
So if I call you
Don't make a fuss
Don't tell your friends about the two of us
I'm not in love, no no, it's because..

I keep your picture
Upon the wall
It hides a nasty stain that's lying there
So don't you ask me
To give it back
I know you know it doesn't mean that much to me
I'm not in love, no no, it's because..

Ooh you'll wait a long time for me
Ooh you'll wait a long time
Ooh you'll wait a long time for me
Ooh you'll wait a long time

I'm not in love
So don't forget it
It's just a silly phase I'm going through
And just because I call you up
Don't get me wrong, don't think you've got it made
I'm not in love
I'm not in love

Updated: I forgot to say originally that the embedded YouTube video shows 10cc playing live at the BBC's Pebble Mill Studios in 1983. Coincidentally, that was the year we moved into a house in Selly Park, just a few blocks from those very studios, following my first (unsuccessful) attempt to leave my first husband. He "persuaded" me that I was delusional to think that I didn't love him, and I'd change my mind once our lives settled down and we moved. Yeah, right. Took another ten years to escape his brainwashing. So this video hits home in many ways.